Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Three Years

Today is a bittersweet day. It is three years, to the day, since my family was forever changed. Three years ago today (Click here to review) my dad fell, broke his neck, and became a quadriplegic. He easily could have died that day, but instead, we were all given the gift of extra time with him. My dad has handled these last 3 years with dignity and grace, and has never let on if he feels sorry for himself or angry. My mom has sacrificed mightily to keep him in good health and to keep their home and affairs in order. This is certainly not the retirement we wanted for them and I wish I had a magic wand that I could wave to make everything right again.

Over the last 3 years some things have gotten easier for my dad. However, dealing with the crap dealt by home health companies, medicare, and the like only get more difficult with each passing day. During times like this the worst part shouldn't be dealing with obtaining proper care.

Now that we have Andy, and now that I have to teach full time again, we simply can't offer the help that we once could and that's a horrible feeling. It's a horrible feeling to know that some things just won't get better no matter how hard you work at it. In a way it's a little bit like dealing with infertility. No matter how hard you work, it just won't be right.

But, the important thing is that he's still my dad. And he's still with us. And Andy loves to cluck at him and it's fun to watch them wave at each other.

8 comments:

  1. What a hard day for your family. Although it is important to celebrate that your dad is still here to love on, that doesn't erase the pain of all that has happened--of all that your family will continue to struggle with in the future. Like infertility, an illness such as this "cheats" you out of the way you dream your life will be. And it is so unfair!

    Sending hugs and love your way today and always. (even though I am a crappy commenter, I always read)

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  2. [Hugs] Wishing your family all the best in the struggles they are facing.

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  3. Sending hugs your way!

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  4. Oh C, I am sending you a huge hug! With my dad still not home after over 9 weeks in the hospital, (although his problems don't compare to the magnitude of your family's situation) having a sick Dad is difficult and just know that someone else out there "gets it."

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  5. It must be so difficult for all of you, but I'm glad you are so thankful that you still have your father with you!

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  6. It's truly a blessing that your dad gets to know and spend time with little Andy. Since my dad passed almost two years ago, I've thought many times how thankful I am that he got to see me get married and get to know Dave. Now I think often that he won't ever know our (future) children. I'm sorry that your dad has to spend these years as a quadriplegic, but glad that you have each other.

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  7. Not an easy day to remember...and Im so sorry for the difficulties that can surface--just thankful that your dad is with you all and can spend priceless moments with your sweet boy...(hugs)

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  8. Anonymous10:29 PM

    You are truly blessed to have both Andrew and your dad in your lives, regardless of the circumstances. The circumstances may not be ideal, but both your dad and Andrew are here and that's something to celebrate.

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