Looking Back, Looking Forward

This is my 300th post as well as the last day of the year so what better way to spend it than to reflect upon the last year.

I reviewed my blog from last January. My, my, my . . . . just how far we have come on this unbelievable journey! Last year at this time I was bidding good riddance to fertility treatments and testing and beginning the process of our adoption paperwork. I had one last visit with my RE and was encouraged to try IVF just one more time. I was full of hope and eager to get on with the business of just living our lives. I had no idea of what was to come. In fact, never in my wildest dreams could I have imagined the blessings that would unfold for us.

2008 did hold it's share of drama and upset for me. After all, we did have to once and for all give up our dream of biological children. It was hard getting back into the swing of teaching full time. In fact, I'm still struggling with it. I allowed myself to be hurt by other's insensitivity and lack of understanding and compassion. I had another doomed pregnancy and miscarriage and surgery.

But, you know what? Absolutely none of that matters anymore. By July our greatest dream had come true and it's been nothing but sheer bliss since then. OK, maybe teaching full time isn't sheer bliss, but it really isn't that bad and it's nice to know that in the current economic climate we are able to alleviate some financial worries.

So what will 2009 hold for us? Only God knows. I've learned that all we can do is go with the flow and muddle through and wait out the difficulties and delight in and cherish the joys. I'm looking forward to watching Andrew grow. I'm looking forward to spending time with B. I'm looking forward to enjoying what we have instead of wishing and planning for what we don't. I'm looking forward to letting "good enough" really be good enough instead of striving for super human standards in my home and classroom. And I'm looking forward to living in this state of bliss that I've been in for months. I never want it to end!

I'm also wishing that all of you can reflect upon the joys you have had this year and feel the pain and disappointment a little less. Further, I'm wishing that you will think of a few things that you are looking forward to in the coming year. And, if you wouldn't mind . . . drop me a comment and let me know what you are looking forward to.