Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Looking Back, Looking Forward

This is my 300th post as well as the last day of the year so what better way to spend it than to reflect upon the last year.

I reviewed my blog from last January. My, my, my . . . . just how far we have come on this unbelievable journey! Last year at this time I was bidding good riddance to fertility treatments and testing and beginning the process of our adoption paperwork. I had one last visit with my RE and was encouraged to try IVF just one more time. I was full of hope and eager to get on with the business of just living our lives. I had no idea of what was to come. In fact, never in my wildest dreams could I have imagined the blessings that would unfold for us.
2008 did hold it's share of drama and upset for me. After all, we did have to once and for all give up our dream of biological children. It was hard getting back into the swing of teaching full time. In fact, I'm still struggling with it. I allowed myself to be hurt by other's insensitivity and lack of understanding and compassion. I had another doomed pregnancy and miscarriage and surgery.
But, you know what? Absolutely none of that matters anymore. By July our greatest dream had come true and it's been nothing but sheer bliss since then. OK, maybe teaching full time isn't sheer bliss, but it really isn't that bad and it's nice to know that in the current economic climate we are able to alleviate some financial worries.
So what will 2009 hold for us? Only God knows. I've learned that all we can do is go with the flow and muddle through and wait out the difficulties and delight in and cherish the joys. I'm looking forward to watching Andrew grow. I'm looking forward to spending time with B. I'm looking forward to enjoying what we have instead of wishing and planning for what we don't. I'm looking forward to letting "good enough" really be good enough instead of striving for super human standards in my home and classroom. And I'm looking forward to living in this state of bliss that I've been in for months. I never want it to end!
I'm also wishing that all of you can reflect upon the joys you have had this year and feel the pain and disappointment a little less. Further, I'm wishing that you will think of a few things that you are looking forward to in the coming year. And, if you wouldn't mind . . . drop me a comment and let me know what you are looking forward to.


  1. I'm looking forward to not having too big a hangover on new year's day:-) Oh, and maybe doing a half marathon cuz I'm crazy like that.

    Happy new year's my friend. PS. I tagged you, which you probably hate as much as me, but you should know just so you know I think you rock.

  2. What an amazing year it's been. May 2009 bring you even more joy!

  3. I am wishing for my family to find a great work balance that will pay our bills and provide for me to be able to enjoy our son

  4. Happy 300 Post! Thank you for actually giving me a bit of perspective. I am a bit on the dreading side for 2009 (lay off from work is looming). But reading your post made me realize that even with that cloud over my horizon--I have a lot to be thankful for. I am looking forward to Michael's tenth Birthday, going to a gaming convention in February, and Willow's continuing growth and wonder of the world.

    Happy New Year!

  5. I'm looking forward to another year of watching LG grow and spending time with him and M. I am also looking forward to meeting my niece, due to arrive Friday at the latest.

  6. I think you can probably guess what I'm looking forward to...the tiny glimmer of hope that I hang onto as we desperately pray and hope for that miracle of our own...and remembering to cherish the moments I have here and now as well.

  7. Anonymous6:59 PM

    Happy New Year Chris and happy 300 posts. Thanks for lighting up my days with your life. I love the bear picture from the previous post. Those are my very favorite pictures. It is amazing how fast they grow! I took a video of Josh and Aaron yesterday and Josh is now 4 inches taller than Aaron. They grow so fast, enjoy every minute.

    Laurie D

  8. I was thinking of you and your year - it has been a roller coaster, huh? And you've dealt with everything (the good and bad) with grace! Here's to another wonderful year!

  9. Happy 300th! I'm just about to hit 100, and it's flown by. Best to you for 2009!